5 years as Ashley

This year marks my 5th year in the industry, so I thought I would give a brief reflection on the past, and outline my plans for the future.

2018

I started my journey at Luxe ( a now-defunct agency) after being recruited off Fetlife. I was not in a good place physically, mentally, or financially and sex work had been on my mind for a while, but I was having trouble finding a place that would take my midsize self. I lucked out when I received a message inviting me to join

I had been curious about sex work for a while and jumped at the opportunity when approached by an agency manager on Fetlife. I wasn’t sure what to expect but found their friendly demeanour comforting and signed up on the spot. My first agency was a small boutique agency that specialised in workers size 14+. While it had its issues, it provided much-needed support and guidance at the time. It was there that I also met Chloe and Briar (since retired) and we quickly became friends.

After five months at Luxe, myself and the other staff staged a walkout over unsavoury working conditions and the agency folded. While Chloe and Briar (the only two size 8-10 workers at our agency) explored their options, I quickly discovered that there wasn’t much out there for midsize me. We discovered that in terms of sex work establishments, that luxe, in fact, was superior in the way it treated its workers and compliance with the OHS guide. The decision was made to go private. Every weekend we would rent a couple of motel rooms between us, and work from 4 pm Friday till midnight Sunday.

It was a difficult time, as it seemed that client respect and willingness to pay stopped at a size 12. Having previously done well at the agency at $250 an hour (of which I took home $175), I found myself sitting around with a dead phone more often than not, getting very jealous of my friends who were working back to back. A big part of this is the agency affiliation effect, where clients are more likely to take a chance to see a “non-traditional” companion if they are affiliated with an agency. The reasoning behind this is that many clients have brand loyalty and reason that if the worker was taken on at the establishment, they must be pretty good, regardless of the trait that makes them stand out from the traditional cis-white-thin woman. While my straight-sized friends were able to sustain business at the previous rate of $250 an hour due to having a wide base an appeal, being a little more niche as a size 14 with massive titties meant that I had to drop my rates to increase demand to a sustainable level so that I could afford to live.

Im not going to lie, its still somewhat of a sore spot for me, as at the time I was being told that it was a “marketing difference” and that I “just wasn’t working hard enough” by other sex workers. All this despite having photos from the same photographers, hosting from the same locations, similar ad copies and offering a more inclusive service.

On the plus side, I discovered that while it is harder being a worker with a more niche appeal, I did tend to retain my clients and was able to foster meaningful relationships with them. Even to this day I still see many clients that have known and supported me since year 1.

2019

By my second year, I had finally got the hang of things and had settled into a routine. With Chloe having a private incall, it meant that I no longer had two pack everything into two and a half days, it meant that I could take inquiries as they came in.

This freedom to work was both a blessing and a curse. It was much less stressful, as I was often ill (chronic illness being the main reason I entered this industry to begin with) and it now didn’t matter if I needed to take a few days off, there was always the rest of the week. The downside was the burnout of being “available” 12 hours a day, 7 days a week. Even with 2 hours notice required, I still needed to drop anything I was doing and rush to the incall to get ready. I ended up with task paralysis, where I couldn’t even sit down and enjoy a video game or a coffee out with friends just in case a booking came through. That’s the nature of this work, you have to do it when it's available. I felt pressure to take on bookings I didn’t want to take because I didn’t want to risk not getting work the next day. There were entire weeks where I wouldn’t get a single booking.

One day I got a cold call from a massage establishment that had just come under new ownership and was looking for staff. Enticed by the idea of not having to do my own admin, and being able to leave work at work, I immediately agreed to meet. It wasn’t too flashy, and they were desperate for staff, but despite this, I took a chance and started working there. I discovered my love of sensual massage and had a lot of fun while I worked there. Unfortunately, it wasn’t very sustainable as it became clear the (male) owner had come into this business with Client Logic^TM and didn’t understand aspects of the business such as “in order to attract clients, you must actually advertise your workers”. He also refused help or guidance from myself or any other worker. It came to a head when he started using my image and name to bait and switch clients, resulting in clients getting angry with me. I left and returned to private work.

After a taste of managed work, I decided I quite liked it and looked to find somewhere else to work. Unfortunately, this was pre-covid, and even the places that take on BBW now, turned their nose up at me when I applied back then. This lead me out of the city to an establishment with a beautiful premise, but barely any staff. I took along my emotional support Chloe and signed up. The induction was…. Interesting. It was clear they did not want experienced workers or people that knew their rights. The manager looked put off by our knowledge of the PRA, and made threats of legal action if we were found to be “stealing their clients”, but took us on anyway.

Turns out there was no need to fear us taking their clients, there were essentially none. We sat on shifts from 6 pm, where by 3 am there had not been a single booking or walk-in. Despite this, we weren’t allowed to leave shift early, “just in case”.

Back to private it was.

2020/2021/2022

The COVID years. A shared fever dream where time just melted away. Due to the difficult situation, I decided to put SW in the back seat and instead focus on civilian pursuits where things were a bit more stable. No worrying about the “moist breath zone” for me.

Sex work had given me the time and money to be able to work on my health and get to a point where I was able to return to study and to pick up a part-time civvie job.

Things finally seemed to be heading back to normal. My first covid infection in march resulted in long covid, that lasted the better part of that year. I returned to SW full-time in June, as it allowed me more flexibility in dealing with post-viral fatigue and a slew of other conditions that weren’t compatible with that civvie grind.

Like everything though, COVID did have a silver lining for this industry. Almost everyone experienced a change in appearance, and establishments became more open to diversity among their staff. Places that had previously turned up their noses at me, now have entire plus-size rosters. 2023+

That brings me to now, my fifth year, and my decision to stop offering solo full-service bookings. Not to fret, I will still be offering social/cuddle and sensual massage dates. I have found that I thrive best with sensual massage and wish for this to be my focus moving forward. I find the clients who seek massage and cuddle dates to be more relaxed and less likely to push my boundaries. Enjoyed my blog? Help me celebrate 5 years as Ashley by purchasing something off my Wishlist. You can also support me by liking, commenting and sharing my posts on social media. All support is greatly appreciated!